It is the inside, not the outside that counts, right? That is what we hear but what we see around us is totally different.  Every day, we are inundated with images of so-called ”perfect” physical beauty and we feel pressured to measure up.  These two concepts of beauty seem to contradict one another.  If beauty is on the inside, then we should be putting our energy into cultivating ourselves to be the greatest possible versions of ourselves.  If beauty is on the outside, we need to head to the gym, the spa or the mall!

Many of us are familiar with the idea famously put forth by Louise Hay that we are all perfect, whole and complete.  We need to do nothing in order to be that way – we always automatically are. I do my best to remember this but there are times when it can be more challenging than others. 

When asked, most of us will say that beauty comes from within.  We will say that it is the qualities we possess, not our physical features that make us most attractive. This is what I call our “public conversation” about beauty, and most of us really believe it.  But then, we stand in front of the mirror and the conversation changes.  The “private conversation” takes over. For many of us, and the first thing we see is what is “wrong”; a new stretch mark, a bump on the nose, wrinkles we swear were not there yesterday, acne, those extra few pounds of holiday weight we have yet to lose…

There is absolutely no reason why I need to look like a stick figure. I do not need to fit into size 0 clothes.  In fact, I don’t think it would be physically possible no matter how much weight I lost because I have hips – real solid bone that would prevent me from ever getting into clothing that small! Yet, if I flip through a fashion magazine, I am presented with images of young women who are practically skeletons, with no hips and surgically enhanced chests, airbrushed to meet standards that are not just unnatural but unobtainable – even by the models themselves. Take, for instance this photo actress Jessica Alba; the original photo is quite beautiful but the editors decided to make her thinner, curvier, and more defined with bigger lips and smaller hips.  She is a stunning woman who needs no retouching and honestly, I like the first image better because she looks like a real woman.